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Realizing it is Bigger Than You – My PreTraining Headspace

ITinkICan0001As a WLS Post-Op turned WLS Fitness Enthusiast there is nothing I love more than knowledge there are people out there that I encourage to move, that I motivate and inspire to get their fit on.  That little tidbit of information right there; that is the kick I live for. That is the moment that my brain hears “cha-ching” as the emotive payday comes rolling into my emotional bank account.

My passion has always been this drive in me to help other people find fitness as a necessary part of their weight loss equation as well as help them find ways to make fitness a fun and pleasant experience rather than one that they hate and despise doing. It is an essential part of my “Do what you love and love what you do philosophy.”

IMG_5315I still remember the morning I ran that half marathon in honor of my Dad. [I Ran a Half Marathon Daddy Happy Father’s Day] It was a benchmark moment in my weight-loss journey. It was the first time I was able to take something that I knew I saw as a negative moment in my life, and re-write the story so that it was something positive and healthy to my journey. Father’s Day doesn’t have to be about being sad and missing my dad anymore, it can be about that one day a year I do something super special in honor of him. That’s a tradition my Father would have enjoyed as well. He’d be proud of the fact that I am at a place emotionally that I can do that.

Re-writing negative moments of my life to make them positive seems to be a theme that has been popping up in my journey lately though I didn’t intend for it to be. I mentioned it in a post back in July as I discussed [Emotions Post Reconstructive Plastic Surgery after WLS] and it was a prevalent thought in my answer to [Why I choose the Tinkerbell Half Marathon] as the first official one I would participate in.

Last month, after my last round of body contouring surgery after massive weight loss, I struggled greatly with the numbers I was seeing on the scale as my body swelled up after the surgery. There were a few moments in that dark crevice of my world where a couple of people shined the light in for me when I needed it.  My dear friend Joy was able to teach me an anchoring technique that I am going to talk about in great length later. Chris Powell helped me by telling me to stay off the scale and reminded me that him and his wife Heidi Powell are continually cheering me on. He reminded me that I am loved and making a difference in my sphere. Which leads me to one of the things that stood out to me most. This was something that was said to me by a dear friend that was trying to help me one night over dinner. As I sat there with Tammy, Debby, Heather, Merrill [Many of you know her as Vitamin M] said something to me that I think will stick with me forever. “Pandora if I put a pin in the map for every life you have managed to touch so far on your journey, and then another pin for every life that person has managed to touch because you managed to touch theirs, perhaps then you would start to grasp that this is way bigger than you baby girl.”

There were so many things Merrill said to me at dinner that night that stuck, but this was one of the big ones.  As much as I hate to admit it this, it knocked me down a peg. This was the moment that I realized for the very first time, that I was chasing something none of us have any business chasing; perfection.  Learning to be, love and appreciate our imperfect selves is something that I think we’re under educated and unarmed with the skills to do when it comes to our weight loss journey.

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Back to those pins though. I’m in awe that what I first intended to just be something I wanted to achieve for myself has manifested into something that I get to be part of not only helping someone else achieve by raising the funds to take Dawn with me; but helping an entire group of people achieve as they join us in a virtual training event and complete an actual half marathon with us in the process. I look at the team roster for the #iTinkIcan Virtual Event and I see twelve pins.  A dozen people whose lives I have managed to touch in some way with Fitness. This is what I dream of doing and I just got a huge emotional payday before I ever even got the job. This is an awesome feeling to carry with me into my commitment to get back to studying tomorrow.

The Tinkerbell Half Marathon Training, Studying, Getting my fitness levels back to where they were, are on my to-do list. There is still 4 months left in  2013 to make it all happen. Here we go! \O/

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About (Pandora) The Author

Author of Desperately Seeking Slender
Jaime "Pandora" Williams

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