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When Emerald Eye Monsters Rear Their Little Heads

As usual my friends over and Post Op and a Doc have posed a question that has me thinking this morning. As I started to respond I realized it was going to be long and decided it would be a good blog post to share with my readers.

This morning they posted the following quote from the movie “As Good As It Gets” (1997) on their Facebook page and asked what their fans thoughts were on the last line of the quote and how if it applied to their lives.

As Good As It Gets (1997)

Carol:   “OK, we all have these terrible stories to get over, and you—”

Melvin: “It’s not true. Some have great stories, pretty stories that take place at lakes with boats and friends and noodle salad. Just no one in this car. But, a lot of people, that’s their story. Good times, noodle salad. What makes it so hard is not that you had it bad, but that you’re that p***ed that so many others had it good.”

IMG_2939I think the use of envy here instead of jealousy is important to note as jealous is reflective of a persons feelings towards another person while envy is reflective of a person’s feelings towards another person’s situation, advantages or accomplishments.

It’s like the other day when I admitted I envy Joan Rivers for having a venue that I do not have, and was disgusted by the was she used it. I am not jealous of Joan Rivers personally, I envy her situation because it is something I dream of having.

I think as with many things whether or not envy is an unhealthy mindset depends largely on what sort of attitude envy is displayed with.

I envy Joan Rivers, I wish I had the venue she has, I wish I was a famous personal trainer with my own weight loss oriented television show, I wish that millions and millions of people cared what I had to say and that I could use those things to help others in their weight loss journeys and evoke positive changes in the world where the fight against obesity is concerned.

I believe that is a positive and healthy example of envy. But envy can be unhealthy. In fact, envy can lead to some of the most malevolent, baleful and malicious behavior ever exhibited; probably one of the very reasons it is considered one of the seven deadly sins.

As someone who as this example suggests, “had it bad,” I can honestly say that there were times that I envied the hell out of people in an unhealthy way. Times I hated women that were skinny and beautiful because I felt like I was overweight and ugly. Times I recanted people who had amazing relationships with their Family and huge supportive families that gather together for holidays and special occasions and where there isn’t drama and discord and lies. There were times I looked at people who were absolute douche bags and seemed to have nothing really positive to offer the world and think, what made that woman deserve a rich husband that a little dog in a purse and a new Maserati and a perfect body because she can afford plastic surgery every other month.

I often blamed my lack of opportunity on being fat. Being super morbidly obese was my excuse for everything. If someone skipped me over, if I didn’t get a job, if someone treated me poorly, it was always because I was morbidly obese. I always believed that if I was skinny more doors would open up for me. But once I was slender, because I definitely don’t identify as skinny, but once I was slender, I started to realize that all those dreams I didn’t reach, wasn’t because I was overweight, it was because I didn’t try. I wanted to be an actress but I never did anything to pursue it. I wanted to be on Television, but I was too ashamed of my size to even try. It wasn’t necessarily that my situation was being hindered by other people’s perceptions and visions of me, but my own. My own self loathing and self-consciousness kept me from ever really trying to succeed at anything.


When I was sixteen, the mother of my high school sweetheart, a grade school principal said to me, “You can hate the life that you were given or you can go build your own.” That’s sort of my view on envy now. ( It’s too bad we understand these lessons 20 years after we are taught them eh? ) If I look at someone’s situation and I envy in it an unhealthy way, I try to figure out what is missing in my life that is evoking those feelings and try to change it. I try to always have a goal that I am working on, something that I am trying to achieve.

I try not to resent the life I had and remember that every moment of pain and heartache has been part of my journey, part of what got me here today, and part of the experience that I apparently needed to find my inner strength, to hear my healthy voice and to be able to help motivate other people in their journeys.

There are still times that I find myself victim to that little green-eyed monster and there are times I experience envy and jealousy, but when I do, I try to remember that if I am focusing that much on someone else and their situation and it’s not because I’m trying to assist them in their weight loss journey, then I’ve lost sight of the goal and it’s time to SCAT … Stop. Collect myself. Access my situation and Take Charge of my emotions.

Speaking of Scatting… I think it’s time to get on with my day, the coffee cup is nearly empty and an outdoor run in a new city is high on my to-do list. I hope you all have a great day and…

Go get your Fitness on!


What will it take to motivate you? How about millions?

A multimillionaire in New Mexico wants you to get off the couch and go searching for hidden treasures.

You know how yesterday in my article about Joan Rivers I told you that I thought the world would be a happier place when I was thin and that somehow I would follow rainbows find pots of gold and discover the last living unicorn. But no such luck? Well  maybe Forest Fenn has other plans for me.

Mr. Fenn believes that too many Americans spend their free time playing video games and watching TV said that he hoped a chest filled with millions of dollars in gold coins, diamonds and other gems will prompt people to get out and explore the outdoors.

Mr. Fenn has a self-published autobiography, which contains a map to the treasure and a poem with 9 clues in it. The book is titled “The Thrill of the Chase.” A title that no doubt comes from Fenn’s own love of rare artifacts, a passion he has been devoted to for over seventy-three years.

Now, I am one to call a spade and spade, so let me say this, what a BRILLIANT marketing strategy! You write a book that contains clues to a buried treasure worth millions of dollars. Whether people want to read your story or not, (Which let me say I do!) you have a whole other sales tactic because they stand to win millions of dollars from reading your book.

Give things away and people will come flocking. It’s just a sad truth. People rarely do something for nothing these days, we forget too often to stop and be kind to each other, half the time we even forget to stop and say hello. I have to tell you that is one of the things I love most about runners. No matter where you go you can be running down the side-walk and you can almost always bet someone will make eye contact, give you a nod of the head, or often times, a wave or a hello. Runners are very courteous and friendly to each other.

Bloggers experience the same thing. In fact when I first started my blog I realized very quickly that most of the successful blogs did big giveaways to help boost numbers and readers. There was a time in the beginning that I was after that, a big following, a huge readership, and then I realized that I was investing more time in that then I was in what really mattered to me, becoming a trainer, helping people find the fun in fitness and fundraising for the organizations I am passionate about to help make sure that other people have the chance at a happy healthy life. I don’t have a big following with thousands of likes and I may never, but I can pride myself on the fact that according to my site stats, my page got as many views when I talk about my experience with Reconstructive Plastic Surgery as it did when I gave away my 4th Generation IPod touch to try to inspire people to get in the gym with music.

LittleOleDaddyThat is what I love about Forest Fenn’s story, it may be a brilliant marketing strategy, but it is also an amazing story of someone who wants to motivate others to break out of the unhealthy couch potato stereotype, get fit and have fun doing it. Since this is my own personal goal as well I feel I have found a kindred soul. Maybe I’m overly sentimental, but my Father was Irish, St. Patrick’s Day is approaching, a day that was always celebrated in my house because it was also the day my Father choose as my parent’s wedding day. My Dad LOVED and I mean LOVED rainbows and if my Father had heard my Negative Betty comment yesterday he would have told me a story about why rainbows existed. He would have reminded me that nothing worth having ever comes easy. He would have reminded me that there are still pots of gold in this world and that sometimes that magical unicorn you are looking for sometimes appears in a different form than you expect. He’d remind me that good people are hard to find, rare gems, but that they are out there. ( BTW I love stories like this where I get to reference my Dad and post his picture! ) And if my Dad was still here, and he had told me those things, and he read this story this morning; he’d have sat it in front of me, winked at me and said, “See there Jaime Lee, I told you, now that man, that’s a hero.” I talk about people who I consider my personal heroes Chris Powell, Ellen DeGeneres, NKOTB, if you ever notice, it’s the people who have taught me what I know about kindness and generosity, about not just helping people, but really caring about the people who you help and appreciating the people who help you.

The article I read on Today News ( See: Want to find his hidden treasure worth millions? Head outdoors ) said that Fenn has received close to 7,500 emails about the treasure some filled with questions and looking for guidance and some just wanting to thank him for the inspiration and motivation he has inspired in them. I will be buying Forest Fenn’s book, even though I likely won’t ever make it to the location of the treasure to look for it, I love the concept, I just want to be a part of the whole experience and I can’t wait to follow this story and see how long it takes for someone to find this buried treasure. This blog is my way of saying thank you, for showing me that there still are pots of gold in life. I just love it when something like this happens right after I make a comment like that; I believe it is the Universe reminding me who I am and re-instilling my positive outlook and pay it forward theology.


If you happen to read “Thrill of the Chase” yourself or you happen to go looking for the treasure, or Forest Fenn has motivated you into the outdoors or a healthier and happier life  please share your experience with me! I’d love to hear it! You can email me at

As of yesterday, March 1, 2013 a 10th Clue was revealed on Today News ( See: New clue revealed in hunt for hidden treasure worth millions ) Below is the text of Mr. Fenn’s poem with the original 9 clues embedded in it.

 “As I have gone alone in there
And with my treasures bold,
I can keep my secret where,
And hint of riches new and old.
Begin it where warm waters halt
And take it in the canyon down,
Not far, but too far to walk.
Put in below the home of Brown.
From there it’s no place for the meek,
The end is drawing ever nigh;
There’ll be no paddle up your creek,
Just heavy loads and waters high.
If you’ve been wise and found the blaze,
Look quickly down, your quest to cease
But tarry scant with marvel gaze,
Just take the chest and go in peace.
So why is it that I must go
And leave my trove for all to seek?
The answers I already know
I’ve done it tired, and now I’m weak
So hear me all and listen good,
Your effort will be worth the cold.
If you are brave and in the wood
I give you title to the gold.
Happy Hunting!”

You can find out more about Mr. Fenn’s Poem and the 9 clues embedded in it on the Today News website. ( See: Follow these clues to find Forrest Fenn’s treasure! )

For more information on The Thrill of the Chase, Forest Fenn and his treasure buried in the mountains of North Santa Fe his book is available from or 505-988-4226 You can also find The Thrill of the Chase on Facebook

Forest Fenn, I wish I could meet you and shake your hand, your “If I’ve got to go, well I outta just let somebody else have as much fun with this as I have,” attitude reminds me so much of my Father. This is just the sort of thing that my 1926 born, old fashion Texan to the roots Dad would have done if he had the means to do it. I’m always so touched by the generosity of others, it is people like you that keep my faith in humanity renewed and my spirit to motivate and help others kindled. As I said when my Father passed away a couple of years ago, I don’t believe they build men like you and my Father anymore. I think you are a dying breed in our society and it saddens me. I hope that others are learning from your examples so that we may pass it on for generations to come.


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Author: Pandora Williams

Author of Desperately Seeking Slender

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