Self-Worth

13 03, 2019

Sex, Love and Obesity Part 26 – Why Didn’t You Fight For Me?

By |2019-03-13T14:50:54+00:00March 13th, 2019|My Story, Sex, Love & Obesity|0 Comments

When we left of in Sex, Love and Obesity part 25 I was at a place where I began to recognize the pattern. Having too many loose threads in my life and too many possible love interests was making my already difficult struggle regaining control of my Dissociative Identity Disorder even harder. Although I recognized the pattern, fixing it wasn’t as easy as it would seem. For me to start tying up loose ends, parts of [...]

4 03, 2019

Sex Love and Obesity Part 25 – Unraveling At The Seams

By |2019-03-04T12:43:48+00:00March 4th, 2019|My Story, Sex, Love & Obesity|0 Comments

In Sex, Love and Obesity Part 24 I discussed a relapse into my pleasure-seeking behaviors that happened while I was at a weight loss convention in Portland trying to deal with all the loose strings that existed in my life. Think of the life you live as a sweater that you wear. Mine had a lot of loose strings. If I didn't find a way to deal with them surely one of them was [...]

25 02, 2019

Sex, Love and Obesity Part 24 – Using Sex as a Drug

By |2019-03-03T10:02:51+00:00February 25th, 2019|My Story, Sex, Love & Obesity|0 Comments

In Sex Love and Obesity Part 23 I had a major slip in my decision making while attending a convention in Portland. In that moment, albeit unintentionally, I had lit a match to my life. The decisions I made in this over emotional state would quite literally start to burn down everything around me. I didn't recognize it yet but using sex as a go-to feel better drug was a problem. Let's [...]

18 02, 2019

Sex Love and Obesity Part 23 – Emotional Arson – F*ck it, Light a Match

By |2019-03-03T10:03:58+00:00February 18th, 2019|My Story, Sex, Love & Obesity|0 Comments

In Sex Love and Obesity Part 22 I introduced you to the concept of Dysfunctional Dissociation. Meaning, several different parts of me are making different decisions at different times and it's not working out well. I’m not always in agreement with those decisions. It had been about three weeks since I left the apartment with Peter in it. Three weeks of constant arguing with Peter over the phone and text messages [...]

11 02, 2019

Sex Love and Obesity Part 22 – Dysfunctionally Dissociative

By |2019-03-03T10:14:55+00:00February 11th, 2019|My Story, Sex, Love & Obesity|0 Comments

Understanding Dissociative Identity Disorder and Dysfunctional Dissociation  When we left off in Sex Love and Obesity Part 21, my entire life when it came to sex, love and decisions that involved those two things was unraveling at the seams. Every part of me was going in a different direction. Each part of me wanted something distinctly different. If you read my Dissociative Identity Disorder - Six Women One Mind blog, you'll understand [...]

21 10, 2018

Sex Love and Obesity Part 21

By |2018-11-10T10:26:18+00:00October 21st, 2018|My Story, Bariatric Wellness, Sex, Love & Obesity|0 Comments

In “Sex, Love and Obesity Part 20,” I talked about the day I finally got in my car and drove away. I was out of the house now, and the change in my stress and anxiety levels allowed me to stop turning to drugs and alcohol as coping mechanisms and escape. Last week, in “Dissociative Identity Disorder – Six Women One Mind,” I tried to paint you a clear picture of how my system works [...]

12 10, 2018

Dissociative Identity Disorder – Six Women One Mind

By |2018-11-10T10:15:34+00:00October 12th, 2018|My Story, Bariatric Wellness|0 Comments

For people with Dissociative Identity Disorder dealing with fear can be a very uncomfortable experience. Fear is a powerful emotion. It can motivate you to start invoking change very quickly. But the problem is that fear isn’t always rational; which means it can lead you to make irrational decisions if it is the underlying emotion driving your actions. In Sex, Love and Obesity Part 20 I moved out of the apartment. I ran away to [...]

5 10, 2018

Sex Love and Obesity – Part 20

By |2018-11-10T10:06:24+00:00October 5th, 2018|My Story, Bariatric Wellness, Life After Weight Loss|0 Comments

In Sex, Love and Obesity Part 19 - I had gotten in my car and drove away. Have you ever dated someone who brings out the worst in you? It’s like a strange chemical reaction that you can’t explain. It’s like having two typical household items underneath your bathroom sink. Bleach and Vinegar. Singularly they are both safe, non-toxic products.  But mix them together and now you’ve got a dangerous chlorine gas that can cause [...]

16 09, 2018

Sex Love and Obesity Part 19

By |2018-10-05T09:19:56+00:00September 16th, 2018|My Story, Bariatric Wellness, Life After Weight Loss|0 Comments

In Sex Love and Obesity Part 18 I talked about the fight that Peter and I had that sent me over the edge. At this point I didn’t care if he loved me. I didn’t even care if nobody else ever loved me. It didn’t matter that I loved him anymore. It didn’t matter how much I loved him. It didn’t matter that the sex was once amazing. At that point I really didn’t care [...]

9 09, 2018

Sex Love and Obesity Part 18

By |2018-12-12T18:06:52+00:00September 9th, 2018|My Story, Bariatric Wellness, Life After Weight Loss|0 Comments

In Sex Love and Obesity Part 17 I had drawn a line in the sand. I had clearly told Peter that if the fighting and arguments didn’t stop and if I continued to feel emotionally abused in the relationship I was going to leave. You know how they say perception is reality? That was so true here. His perception was that we didn’t fight that much. That there were more good times than there [...]