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A rough New Years Eve feeling insecure

It’s been really hard for me to read posts on Thinner Times where people lost 50lbs their first month after surgery, and not ask myself what the heck I’m doing wrong, super analyzing everything I put in my mouth and constantly asking myself if I screwed up, if the pouch isn’t working for me, is I stretched it, or whatever the case might be, I’m super paranoid constantly.  It seems to me like the weight came off faster pre-surgery when I was getting ready for surgery.

The other day I sat down and did the math – I started this journey on 7/10/10 at least that is where we started tracking my weight.

  • 07/10/10 – 395lbs
  • 08/09/10 – 369lbs  (-26)
  • 09/08/10 – 349lbs  (-20)
  • 10/02/10 – 334lbs  (-15)
  • 10/19/10 – 324lbs  (-10)
  • 10/27/10 – 330lbs  (+6 )
  • 11/10/10 – 315lbs  (-15)
  • 12/06/10 – 305lbs  (-10)

So in the first three and half months I lost 71lbs that was from 7/10 – 10/19 that’s 13 weeks. 71lbs in 13 weeks.

Now since surgery I’ve lost 25lbs the last time I’m counting was back on 12/06 so that would have been about 6 weeks out.  That seems like a huge slow down for me, but I guess if you count the 6lbs I gained and lost again it is really more like 31lbs and not so different from what I was losing before surgery.  I’ll have to see where I’m at when I am 13 weeks out and compare because that will be the real test and the numbers won’t be so iffy then.

It’s New Years Eve, the tradition here is to order pizza and watch movies. I’m going to pull the toppings off a couple pieces of pizza and have at it, not going to touch the crust though.  I found on the web that the toppings from a medium slice of pepperoni pizza have 213 calories and 12 grams of protein. That’s not great, but it’s better than eating the whole slice was better, and I still get to be a part of the household tradition and not feel left out.

In other news I found this rather entertaining site about how many calories you burn during different sexual activities. Now I have to admit at first I thought this was serious, but when I started reading about how many calories you burned “Nagging him to do it.” And that doing it like “It was a serious emergency” burned 911 calories, I started to get that it was a joke. Regardless it kept me entertained for a good 15 minutes and helped waste part of that hole “Waiting 30 minutes to eat once you stop drinking.” Thing which is really the BIGGEST PAIN IN THE ASS. If there is one part of having weight loss surgery I’d like to get rid of it’s that. Let me drink with food again and loss the whole stop drinking 30 minutes before and don’t drink for 30 minutes after thing and I’ll be a happy camper.

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Author: Pandora Williams

Author of Desperately Seeking Slender

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